Be A Donner, Not A Beggar

Hey, you are looking happier, younger and healthier than the last time we had met one year ago. I could see an astonishing change in your personality, attitude and behavior. What happened…? What did you do…? - Mankesh asked his friend Sarvana.

I remember very well, we were working together, you were always looking stressed and tensed, your mind was always cluttered with so many things and thoughts. You were appearing anxious and upset. Your life was surrounded by negativity only. Always complaining, criticizing and carping.

And now, I do not not see any sign of tension and stress on your face.  That is amazing. I am happy for you, but I am curious to know about it.

Sarvana replied with a genuine smile on his face – I will tell you everything in detail. That is not a big deal to be happy and healthy. Just a simple thing I did and that changed my entire life altogether. First, let us go for a cup of coffee.

They both went for Coffee. Sarvana led him to the coffee shop, and ordered two cups of coffee.

They hold the cup of coffee and went to a nearby park. They sat on a bench. Mankesh was continually observing Sarvana`s behavior. He did not believe his eyes  how a person can change so much in one year. What treasure he got, why is he so happy, did he win some lottery, or got some better job……so many questions were revolving in his mind.

You wanted to know about the change in my personality …right..? – asked Sarvana

Yes … definitely – affirmed Mankesh

With a sip of coffee, Sarvana started –I did not get a  better job or better boss or win lottery or any external treasure. Everything external is the same as it was earlier. I did not do anything in that. We cannot do anything either in external affairs.

Then what you did …?

Yes … When you had met me last time, I was a beggar. That is why, I was not happy. A beggar cannot be happy, no matter what …?

What are you saying …? You were a beggar …!! Come on. I know, you had then also a good job with handsome salary. Do not joke…. Please tell me the reality --- appealed Mankesh.

Yes, you heard that right. I was a beggar at that time and now I am a king. 

But you said that nothing has changed. Now you are saying that you have become a king from a beggar. What is the mystery. Can you please elaborate it…?

I was so poor at that time that I was always asking something to someone. I remember, I did not spend even a single day at that time when I did not ask anything to anyone.  In sooth, I was a beggar of an inferior quality. Without begging I was thinking that I would not survive. I had a scarcity of everything. Now, I am not poor. I need not  beg anything from anyone. I have so many things to give.

What does it mean ? – Inquired Mankesh

Ok .. I will tell you. I know at this moment - you are mapping my abundance and indigence with my money and property I have accumulated. But in reality, my abundance and indigence is not related to my money and property. I do not have much difference in the increment of my financial condition from last year to this year.

I was deprived, I was a beggar, not because I did not have sufficient money for my survivals and rudimentary necessities, I always had more than sheer survival. Despite good job and handsome salary and ample facility and luxury, I was living like a beggar, because, I was always seeking something from someone. That habit had made me a slave of the people and things around me.

I was always expecting that everybody should give respect and value to me irrespective of my attitude and behavior towards them. I was looking for the acknowledgment from others for the verification of my value and respect. It means, my value and respect was at the mercy of others. When I was being ignored from someone, I was feeling low and degraded. My happiness and sadness was not mine, but was controlled by others. These are nothing but the different forms of the begging. 

I was always looking others to come first and appease me. I was begging for my increment and appraisals when I was in Job. I had become sycophantic towards my boss for the same. I was criticizing my company policy and boss behavior in his behind but in front of them, I was demonstrating that no one can be more loyal to the company and the boss more than me. But, in reality, to maintain my value I was criticizing everything and everyone. That habit had inculcated the inferior complexity in me.

When I  was thinking that others have more than me, that was upsetting me. And whenever the thoughts were evolving that I have more than others, that was giving me the feeling of arrogance. In every aspect, I had become a slave of my mind. In true sense, I was impoverished and beggar.

I was just reading and hearing about happiness, but in fact, the happiness was far away from me, despite having everything with me . To get the value and respect in the eyes of others I was showing that I was happy with my life.

I was tired of such kind of artificial life. Then, I contemplated my life and demeanor towards my life to find out the reason of my unhappiness in my life despite having those many things from which millions of people are bereft of.

That worked out and I realized – there is no problem with the world. This world is running the way it is designed. There is no issue with the people of the world either. People behave according to their nature. Everybody`s nature is different. Everything and everybody cannot behave the way we want.  That is absolutely not in our hands.

 But, certainly one thing in our hand that is our own behavior and thought process. We cannot control the people the way they behave and act, but, certainly we can react and behave the way we want. That is in our control.

I had unrealistic expectations from the people and the world. The unnecessary expectations had pushed in the mire of distress.

Life is very uncertain. No one knows which moment would be the last moment. If you expect to get a better life in the future at the cost of the present life, that is not going to happen. That has not happened in the past with anyone and that is not going to happen in the future too. Many people in the past have spoiled their present moment in the expectation for the better future. And they have never got that.  And that is being repeated in the contemporary also. Most of us, spoil our present moment in the expectation for the better life in the future which never happens.

Instead of expecting a better life in the future, why not we try to make our present life better and live it to the fullest. Only one moment, which we can live is the present.

The majority takes birth on this planet and die with many expectations without enjoying their beautiful life.

I decided – I am not going to be the part of the majority who die without seeing the beautiful face of their life. No, I am not going to be like that. I am not going to wait even till tomorrow to enjoy my beautiful life, I will do it from today, from now.

Nature has made me an emperor. The ocean of treasure is inside me. No, I am not going to live like a beggar, rather I am going to be a donner. I am going to an emperor.

Instead of expecting and asking value, respect and sympathy from others like beggars, as a donner, I started  giving value, respect and gratitude to the people around me what they deserve. Instead of complaining, carping and criticizing, I started praising and appreciating.

Good and bad things happen around us. It depends upon us what we perceive. Instead of finding something bad in others and carping, I started appreciating something good that person was possessing.

Instead of criticizing the weather, I started expressing gratitude for the availability of the environment which makes us to survive on this planet. And so many things.  When I developed that habit, I started finding zillions of reason to be happy and grateful than in distress.

When I developed an attitude of becoming a donner, the entire dimension of my life changed. The happiness and richness you observe on my face and existence is the result of changing my beggar mindset. Now, I am living a natural life without caring who thinks what about me.

I live like a king. No fear of losing anything, because nothing belongs to me. No need to beg or become a slave of anything or anyone because I do not have expectations from others. This can be done by anyone, and you are not an exception.